Thursday Movie Picks: Holiday Horror

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You know what day it is. Yup, it's Friday Eve. It's a day when all the world should be in a festive mood as they prepare for the wonder that is Friday. Adults will be up late planning fun family activities that their teens want no part of. Little children will lie in bed awake with anticipation, and...wait. I've gone off the rails.

What I meant to say is that the topic chosen by Wanderer at Wandering Through the Shelves for this week's Thursday Movie Picks is "Holiday Horror." No problem, I've got plenty of those. I thought about going with an all-Christmas theme, but that would inevitably lead me to talk about some movies with a not-so-jolly St. Nick that I've already suggested. Even worse for my delusion of cinematic superiority I might pick something YOU pick. I can't keep pulling off this super edgy 'cooler than thou because I watch crap you won't vibe if I do that. Speaking of crap. Here are this week's picks.

Slaughter High 

(1986) 

Holiday: April Fool's Day

Any of you who think April Fool's Day is a real holiday obviously haven't taught elementary school. And at the 3rd grade level, the jokes are just the best worst. Every year, I get told my shoe is untied about a thousand times before lunch. And those are the cleverest of the "pranks." Gotta love kids. By the time they get to high school, they might get too good at this sorta thing, like in the movie. Some poor sap gets disfigured by a prank gone wrong. A decade later, he shows up at the high school with an axe to grind. Literally.

Night of the Demons 

(1988) 

Holiday: Halloween

True story: I haven't been to a Halloween party since I was barely in high school. It was fun, but nothing like the movies I watched back then (and now, who am I fooling). Ya' know, the ones with beauties, booze, and boobs everywhere, and everyone just yukking it up, having a grand time. Usually, they're in someone's house. Occasionally, it'll be in a hotel. Every now and again, as is the case in the movie, a group of idiots will decide to have their party in an abandoned funeral home and accidentally awaken an evil spirit. Fun times.

Leprechaun 2 

(1994) 

Holiday: St. Patrick's Day

True story: I've never been to a St. Patrick's Day party, or parade, or even drank a green beer. That's what St. Patrick's Day is all about right? I know there's a whole story that's integral to Irish heritage and traditions, but I'm an American victim of commercialization, so green beer it is. It's a little more than that in the movie, though. The titular leprechaun wants to give himself a present for his 1,000th birthday. Yes, you read it right. Anyhoo, what he wants is to make a bride (read concubine) out of a descendant of one of his slaves. As you might expect, she's down with green beer and all, but marrying a murderous little person is a step too far.